I’ve been home from my ten days in Hawai’i for about three weeks now. It makes me think of Dido’s Sand in my Shoes; “Two weeks away feels like the whole world should have changed, but I’m home now, and things still look the same.”
There’s that feeling that you’ve changed somehow, or things should have changed and haven’t. Basically, I’ve been struggling. I haven’t adjusted to the time change and I haven’t adjusted back into life. I’m either sleeping too much or not enough and eating too much or not enough. There doesn’t seem to be an inbetween. Everything seems to bore me, I have no motivation and, simple things like putting petrol in my car cause me anxiety.
I have a lot of plans for October: an Austen meeting today, an online group read which will lead into creating a podcast and a course which will lead into creating my own course. I want to find the energy to do these things as well as get back to writing. Next week I start working with a nutritionist to check the fuel going in is sufficient and starting today I give up my afternoon naps which have been the only thing getting me through. Wish me luck.